love songs and chocolate

Valentines Day.

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For me, the 14th of February is mostly an excuse to listen to cheesy love songs and sing along with all my heart while eating chocolate with less guilt than any other day. Thinking it would be great if that someone liked me back too, of course, but that’s not a thought reserved for this particular date.So music and shameless chocolate eating it is. Being me, I have a playlist with all sorts of love songs for today, and I thought I would share, you know, if you too have a bit of a lonely heart, or just want to listen to some some great love songs.

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anticipated reads for 2018

Now I know, we’re already a month into the year so it might be a little bit late for this post, but I’ve had my hands full so I’ve neither had time to read any of the books I wanted to mention for my “anticipated 2018 reads”, nor to write them down. I still don’t actually have the time, but I set a new years resolution to post twice a month and I couldn’t let myself fail right away. So here’s a few books I would really like to read in 2018.

A Little Life – Hanya Yanagihara

I’ve talked about A Little Life before, always with the aspiration to read it within a moth or two. That hasn’t happened, as you may have guessed. However, I’m still looking forward to reading it very much, as I’ve heard plenty of great things about it.

The Book Thief – Markus Zusak

The Book Thief was given to me as a Christmas gift, and since I keep hearing amazing things about it, I’m going to read it as soon as possible.

A Reaper at the Gates – Sabaa Tahir


I’m very excited about the third book in the An Ember in the Ashes series. It’s really good and has so many good characters I just -. I do probably need to reread the first two books beforehand, but I’m looking forward to having a reason to do that too.

Useless Magic -Florence Welch


This book is on the page of my BuJo with things I’m looking forward to in 2018. Like together with travels and such. I CAN’T WAIT. Florence is one of my favorite musicians and I’m sure her book is going to be incredible. July 5th, please arrive soon.

Here I need to fill some space to make this decent so here, isn’t this a great picture of a great person ahh I love her.

The Picture of Dorian Gray – Oscar Wilde

I don’t know, I have very high expectations for Dorian Gray. It’s a book I want to read not only because it’s a classic and everyone loves it, but also because it seems like a fantastic book just from the summary. I’m just really excited to read it (and I have an edition I love too, which makes it even more fun).


What are you excited about reading in 2018?

a new year

I’m just over an hour into the new year, and naturally I’m thinking about what I want to do with it. I love New Years eve as well as January 1st. It’s a time when I feel that anything is possible, and I savor the feeling in notes on my phone, scribbles on pieces of paper and whatever else I have on hand, writing down what I can do with the 365 days in front of me. That’s quite a lot of chances to try something new, make yourself happy or become fantastic at that one thing you’ve always wanted to learn. For me, the marking of a new year is a time to look back and reflect on everything good that happened during the passed year and what I have accomplished, as well as giving myself a new chance at what I didn’t do.

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the time I met adam silvera

I’ve been staning in line for I don’t know how long, thinking about what to say when I finally get to meet Adam Silvera. Actually, I’ve been thinking about it longer than that. On my way to the book fair, and the day before, and on the train to Copenhagen. How do I tell someone how important he and his books are to me? “I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but -” No, that wouldn’t work. “Your books are so important to me, they really -” Maybe I could say that. I’m sure he’s heard it endless of times though. Maybe I shouldn’t say anything, just pretend like his books and their meaning doesn’t really affect me at all. But that doesn’t seem right. There’s this part in They Both Die at the End that really spoke to me. I want to tell him about it, but no matter how much I turn it over in my head, I can’t figure out how to explain to him just how much it meant to me. After forever but not nearly long enough, I’m suddenly first in line, still with only fractions of sentences planned. My heart is beating quicker than usual and my hands are shaking. It’s been that way all day.

Adam Silvera is standing right in front of me, asking about my name. I tell him it’s Tilda and take a deep breath, or as deep as I manage, nervous as I am, and try to explain how this one scene impacted me, how happy I felt reading it and how much I related to Rufus’ character. How important his loved ones acceptance was. I stumble over my words and it takes a while before I get it right, but I finally get my point across. “And they accepted him, and that just gave me hope that my friends will as well,” I say, or something like that. It’s hard to remember. What he says on the other hand, I don’t think I’ll ever forget. He tells me how the people who accepted him when he was younger are still in his life today, how my friends today are supposed to last a lifetime, so they have to accept who I love. Sure, some of this I’ve read and heard before, someone I don’t know telling someone else I don’t know, but Adam says all of it to me. I actually get to hear someone who has been in a similar position addressing me. When he wishes me all the best, it means more than anyone else’s assuring words have ever meant, because I know that he is talking from experience. I know he understands the way I’m struggling. I also know how I’ll be absolutely fine, because suddenly I feel like I’m maybe not so alone after all.
I’ve always known I’m not the first queer person to walk the earth, of course, but to for the first time meet someone else, and get to listen to him telling me about his experiences, is more important than I could ever put down in words. It’s the most relieving feeling ever.

Once I’ve left the signing table, I cry floods. It’s not bad tears though. It’s the kind of tears that you shed once you’ve been relieved from something heavy, the ones that comes from sheer exhaustion.received_1627104150703269-01.jpeg


Rest-of-the-year TBR

As I’ve said in the last 3 or 4 posts now, reading is not really something I seem to be doing right now. So a TBR for November would be overly optimistic. Nevertheless, there are some books I would love to read before the end of 2017, so I thought I’d share those, and we’ll see which of them I’ll get to in November.  Continue reading

October TBR

First of all, my reading is a mess right now. I read a grand total of 2 books in September, not because I didn’t have time to read, but because I watched FRIENDS whenever I had a minute to spare. That’s all on me, I’ll admit. I’m done with my rewatch of FRIENDS but unfortunately, I started Brooklyn99, so we’re back to where we started. Anyway, here’s some books I’d like to read in October (although I’m never going to finish them all).
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